Just when we thought people were listening

I have to tell you all that I am very disappointed. Most of you know that the last presidential debate is now over, and the astute among you will also remember that none (yes, none) of the questions had anything to do with how the candidates would use the Presidency to keep us all safe from brads. How can such an important issue be entirely ignored?

We have spent quite a bit of time over the past weeks rallying our supporters and asking them to submit debate questions about brads, and we have submitted a number of questions of our own, including:

• What do you see as the most sinister aspect of brads?
• We realize that many of your campaign contributions come from companies with ties to "the Company". What favors do you feel you owe to the Brad Guys?
• What steps would you take to reduce the use of brads in day cares, preschools, and elementary schools?
• Who should pay for the campaign to eliminate brads from our schools?
  

We had a lot more, but there's very little point reproducing them here, as the candidates clearly won't bother to answer them now.

I know what you're thinking: "If they're such hot-shot future dictators, why didn't they just exert their influence and make the moderator ask those questions." Well, to be honest, we thought about it and decided that it just doesn't sound very democratic. I mean, what's the point of using a democratic institution to further your purpose if you have to make it visibly undemocratic in order to do so? We don't like to crush democracy all that often as it tends to make our supporters nervous. At the GNU Public Dictatorship we are nothing if comforting!