New Intelligence: WMDs in the hands of the Brad Guys

Our latest intelligence confirms what we have feared for quite some time--the Brad Guys have some WMD's (Weapons of Mashed Destruction). According to our intelligence, they currently have only two prototypes, but they are readying the infrastructure to create more.

While we knew they would eventually stumble on the plans regardless of the efforts we have taken to dissuade them, we were surprised at the rapid development along this front. If we don't take action now, it is likely that every Brad Guy in the US will have a pneumatic potato cannon in his possession by the end of the year.

So, what can we do? We suggest that our supporters do the following:

• In the immortal words of Douglas Adams, "Don't Panic"
• Call the GNU Public Window Inspector's office and have them check your windows for resistance to Weapons of Mashed Destruction
• Teach your children about WMD's and the dangers of befriending those that possess them
• Purge your house of brads and related accessories, and don't give in to the temptation to buy more. Whatever money you give to the Company only goes to aid the Brad Guys
• Rest assured that we are doing all within our power to limit the spread of WMD's in the hands of the Brad Guys. We at the GNU Public Dictatorship are nothing if not diligent.