Results of our Annual Election

Many of our supporters have been writing in to request more information about the results of our election to the Board of Dictators, especially since it has been a while since our last post by a guest writer. It is with great sadness that we reveal to you that none of our candidates were accepted. For the curious among our readers, we will give a short summary of all of our finalists and the reasons they were not accepted:

• "Boris" (Angelina Potter) - In spite of his(her) accomplishments, the operative formerly known as "Boris" is not fit for service on the Board of Dictators due to his(her) subversive activities.
• Hannah Jordan - She was perhaps the most promising candidate this year, but she dropped out of the race (and her local GPD office) to pursue other interests, which, for her privacy, we will not discuss here. We appreciate her service as local GPD office leader, and wish her well in her new career.
• Ian Simpson - Ian was also a strong candidate, and we appreciate his being understanding as we investigated his popularity ranking in elementary school. Ian's application was rejected primarily because he (unintentionally) reported false information about his elementary school. We found the discrepancy in our review and informed Ian that his application could no longer be considered this year, but we hope he will try again next year.
• Vlad Smith - Vlad was looking good in our internal reviews until it came out that he was having his cousin, who is an operative of the GPD, write his posts for him. We have encouraged Vlad to apply again next year and to keep practicing his tatting.
• Savannah Geisel - Our reviews of Savannah's application revealed that she had been caught cheating on a test once during her Master's degree in Dictatorship Administration. If she can remedy the situation with her institute of higher learning we will be glad to consider her application next year.
• Janet Ivanovna - After writing a few guest posts Janet decided that her true calling is administering our nuclear physics programs, so she resigned from the race. We are glad to have her back where she feels most useful and wish her well.
• Carson Levine - Carson was in consideration due to his excellent record of keeping his friends from experimenting with brads and brad paraphernalia, but he declined to write guest posts and was disqualified.

We are grateful for all of the interest in our election and look forward to next years' applications.