A deadly assault

It seems that the Unholy Brotherhood of the Hole Punch is getting bolder by the minute. They shipped a load of tainted brads to an unsuspecting man who read the label on the package and soaked them in bleach before cleaning his toiled. Little did he suspect that the tainted brads contained high concentrations of ammonia. At the GNU Public Dictatorship we are nothing if not concerned for your safety, so we urge you to not touch any unsolicited office products. We have advised the mainstream media to not incite panic by blaming the package of brads he received, which is why you'll get a different story from them. We believe our supporters can handle the truth, so please don't prove us wrong.