Appropriate responses

At the GNU Public Dictatorship one of the trickiest things we have to deal with is matching punishment of people who challenge our authority with the seriousness of their opposition.  In most cases this is fairly straightforward.  If someone assaults one of our supporters or operatives, we turn them in to the local courts and charge them with assault.  If they make rude gestures at one of our operatives, our operatives are authorized to return the gestures.  Sometimes, however, punishment is not so obvious.  Occasionally something odd happens, like a window being broken by a random projectile.  In most cases the projectile wasn't intended to break the window but was meant for something else entirely, but due to an error in judgment or perhaps circumstances beyond anyone's control the projectile breaks a window.  In most cases most people would simply ask the person who launched the projectile to pay for replacing the window and may give a lecture about proper safety when using projectiles, but not Jeff Fleming.  His approach was radically different.  After a golfer's stray ball broke one of the windows in his home adjacent to a golf course he exited his home with his shotgun and proceeded to launch (smaller) projectiles back at the golfers at a much higher velocity.  The golfers were injured but not seriously, and the local authorities found that Jeff's approach was inappropriate.

At the GPD it is our stated policy that no method of torture or punishment shall be used by officers or representatives of the GPD unless they have been subjected to the same torture.  We would like to formally ask that our supporters also refrain from using methods of punishment that they have not tried on themselves first.  If Mr. Fleming had used this rule he would not be in trouble with the law, as we doubt he has stood on a golf course and had an angry person wielding a shotgun shoot at him, but we may be wrong as we have not been able to reach Mr. Fleming for comment.  More importantly, however, Mr. Fleming should have reflected on whether shooting someone would be an appropriate response to accidental vandalism.  We're not sure whether he had a punishment chart, but it would have helped him choose the appropriate level of response.  Punishment charts are available at all local GPD County offices and can be obtained by special request as well.  We hope you, our loyal supporters, will use all of the tools available to you!