A remedy?

Just days after the "fungal infections" became front-page news, a mysterious biochemical company has come public with a statement that certain products produced and distributed by the Parent Corporation's MLM OPortunity can be used to effectively prevent and treat "fungal infections." In retrospect it is quite clear that this was the intent all along. The Parent Corporation and its lackey Darkle never wanted to distribute office products (even evil ones) directly to consumers, they wanted to use this MLM venture to change the public perception of their corporation. This is a testament to the fact that we have been successfully eroding their credibility for years now, and we hope this desperate measure will fail. We have our scientists working on disabling the nano-robotic lichens and will announce a remedy as soon as we have one. Until then we urge our supporters not to be taken in by the marketing spiels of these "independent" distributors.