A warning

Hamburger-related injuries are on the rise worldwide, so we thought it might be time to help people with hamburger safety rules.

1. Do not eat a hamburger that is still on the grill/cooking surface. While it may be tempting,eating a burger that is still cooking can cook your face and cause intense pain.
2. Do not consume hamburgers that are known to contain poisons or harmful microbes.
   
3. Do not open your mouth wider than it can go to bite a burger. If you encounter a burger that is too tall to eat, we recommend one of the following approaches:

• Squish it first
• Bite off smaller portions at a less-than-normal angle on the burger. By using more oblique bites you can minimize the danger

At the GNU Public Dictatorship we are nothing if not helpful, and we hope that this post is no exception!