Mission accomplished

At the GNU Public Dictatorship we are nothing if not pleased to report that the reports of carnage due to the brad bombs were greatly overstated.  In fact, there was only one injury sustained by a supporter of the GPD, and that was when he grabbed the New Company operative by the collar and was pulled down to the ground and hurt his knee.  We have started the process of awarding him the "Hero of the People" award, and hopefully will be able to do so very soon.

For those who have been misinformed by the media, we will take some time to explain exactly what happened last Friday:

• October 2013: Due to the apparent inactivity of the New Company, the GPD began investigations to see what their operatives were up to.  We found that they were in possession of great capabilities, but that they were kept back by their lack of organization and commitment.  A plan was hatched to push them into action.
• November-December 2013: Our operatives began to infiltrate the New Company's ranks, inciting them to unity against us.
• January 2014: We began releasing reports stating that the New Company was vanquished, further inciting action against us by their operatives.
• January 14, 2014: We announced our intention to hold coordinated parties around the world, an announcement designed to force the New Company's operatives to act now.
• January 17, 2014: At the celebrations we allowed the operatives to set up their brad bombs and even to detonate most of them before detaining them and interrogating them.  872 operatives were detained in this operation, and based on our previous estimates this constitutes 93.66% of their operatives.  Not completely satisfied with this haul we kept quiet about our success until today.  Over the weekend we were able to nab 9 more (0.97% of their total force).

The short summary is that we were able to lure the New Company's operatives into a mission that was doomed to fail, and that we have annihilated the bulk of their capabilities.  The remaining operatives may still cause confusion and delay, but we know that they are not the immediate threat they were, especially as organizational confusion still reigns over much of the New Company!