Divisions

At the GNU Public Dictatorship we are nothing if not dedicated to honest, open government, which is why we are pioneering the Open Source Model of Government.  Because of our open nature, the GPD has never had a problem with factions vying for power or schisms or any of that sort of thing, as when they begin they are quickly diluted by the free flow of information that empowers our citizens.  They aren't swayed by demagogues or hatemongers.

Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately, depending on your point of view) the Parent Corporation has chosen not to follow this open model but has instead built layer upon layer of secrecy around its goals.  This secrecy has served them well and allowed them to escape the kind of scrutiny that would shut them down in a heartbeat, but has also created a culture that accepts political posturing and demagoguery.  It has come to our attention recently that the Parent Corporation is divided into at least two major groups with different goals.  One group is pushing for the end to the secrecy so that they can openly declare war on the world.  The other is trying to maintain the status quo so that they can remain in power and keep not just the world down, but their subordinates as well.  The "status quo" group are the ones who have recently introduced the adoration of Chef Craft products as part of their daily routine, and, according to our operatives, have withdrawn further into the propaganda that the Parent Corporation is pushing on the world.  Encounters with the "Chef Crafties" have shown that they are less likely to back down or retreat when they are obviously defeated and that they are more fully indoctrinated than their peers.

We have been tracking this developing schism for some time trying to figure out whether "Edgar" (the real leader, not the public face that we captured some time ago) has chosen one faction or another.  We couldn't answer this question until I came across some interesting documents last weekend in Cedar City, Utah.  The documents have yet to be completely verified, but they have born our initial scrutiny.  They were seized in a raid of a suspected double agent's home (we have to say he is innocent until proven guilty, but we don't have to believe it). If they are indeed accurate, it seems that "Edgar" is afraid that either faction taking over will destroy his position and so he is trying to foment the schism, keeping both sides roughly equal in power and influence.

We wish we could state that the Parent Corporation is disintegrating, but we can only really say that there are divisions within it that are causing it to be less effective in its stated goals.  We wish we could say we are winning, but we don't know what will emerge amid this conflict, so we are urging our supporters everywhere to be vigilant and to help out wherever they can!